I dont know what to think.

So lately, lots of weird stuff has been going on with the kids. They have been seeing things, feeling things and hearing things that I cant explain to them. Call me crazy or whatever, I really dont care because we have had these personal experiences ourselves and know what the deal is.

Ever since we moved in here we have been seeing things. There was the cat shadow in the basement that both Cliff and I saw. Shortly after that the kids would talk about a white cat down there. Jade was 3 and Robbie was 5. Then there was someone or something coming down the basement stairs when me and Cliff were watching TV down there. We thought it was one of the kids waking up and coming to look for us but when we went to check there was no one there. The kids were fast asleep tucked into bed still.

Then there was the incident with Jade seeing a figure run through the hallway from Robbies room. She startled for a moment and was like "mom! I just saw someone run from Robbas(her nickname for her brother) room!" She doesnt have an over active imagination and has never made things up like that. It threw me off none the less. Then there was Robbie telling me a big cat always following him around. He keeps telling me "mom I feel like something is always following me". He was laying in bed talking to me one night and he kinda jumped up and was like "whoa! something just touched my leg." a few nights ago he was laying here again and picked his head up and asked me if I had whispered his name. He said it sounded like someone whispered "Robba" in his ear.

Tonight they both see a blue ball of light dart from the kitchen into the dinning room and it disappears. They were both at the table playing with their play dough and came running to find me to tell me.

Im seriously tired of this house. Im tired of my children being afraid to go into the playroom alone. I dont make a big deal out of the things they tell me because I do not want to feed that fear and put ideas into their heads.

Ive asked what ever it is to leave my kids alone. That this is our house and I will not condone it scaring my kids. I make sure my kids say their bedtime prayers at night and when I go to bed I ask for the lords protection over my family.

Its not fun anymore. I want it to go away.

WOOHOO!!

He got his raise and promotion!

5% plus 7k in training bonus! Upped to SSEII!!!

He wasnt happy about what they gave him when they sat down and he told them give him the training or work out a different figure for the raise. He got a call a little while ago that said they approved the training bonus.

Rules of Engagement when it comes to friendship and me...

I have a set of standards I follow when it comes to being friends with people. I offer respect to people and its up to them to keep that respect or lose it with their own actions.

This is how I role:

I like you before I hate you. If you haven't given me a reason to dislike you then you are good to go. Which leads me to my next rule...

I give second chances to those who I honestly believe mean well and show change. I'm a sucker with a good heart that sees the good in people but sometimes I am blind to the evil in a person. Ive let people back in after they have hurt me in the past only to be hurt by that person again. The second time is the last time.

I DO NOT gossip about people. I cant stand it! I will turn my head to it and ignore it. I offer that respect to everyone and I hope that the same respect is returned to me.

I DO NOT tell people secrets that they have confided in me. If you tell me something, it goes to my grave with me. I have very very few friends I can trust with my deepest secrets and I hope to god they do not use them as content for gossip. If I find out that what Ive said in confidence to a person has been said to others, the friendship is over then and there. I cannot be friends with people I cannot trust. This includes telling others my personal business that they dont need to know about(seriously, if I havent told them, they dont need to know).

I am not two faced. If I have something to say to you, Ill say it. You will know when I don't like you.

I respect other people opinions and I am open minded to things unless I have my own beliefs already set on certain issues and subjects. We are all unique individuals with different views. We can learn and teach one another.

I do not play high school teenage games. This is REAL life and the REAL world. I graduated school early 10 years ago so I could leave that world behind and grow up.

I understand a lot of people I know are still young and have a lot of growing to do just like I did when I was their age. I wont always agree with their actions but I will respect the fact that we all have to learn through our own trial and errors.

I'm sure I have more but Ill have to add them when I get more free time but these are the most important to me.

finally!!!!

I think he is finally ready to settle in and buy a home! Ive been waiting for this!!! We are going to go look at houses in Bristow. Its still in Fairfax County but the ones we are going to look at are all under $300k and BEAUTIFUL!

Seriously, Im so done with this house! And renting! To finally own a house big enough for my family of 5 that isnt falling apart or leaking will be probably the greatest thing since chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream HAHA.

YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Motherhood.

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms,wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, 'It's okay honey, Mommy's here.'

Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.

For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes.And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.

And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football, soccer or softball games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars.

And that when their kids asked, 'Did you see me, Mom?' they could say, 'Of course, I wouldn'thave missed it for the world,' and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair
when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner.

And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand)mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.

For all the mothers who read 'Goodnight,Moon' twice a night for a year. And then read it again, 'Just one more time.'

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoe laces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls 'Mom?' in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home -- or even away at college -- or have their own families.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches, assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14 year olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shooting. For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from school, safely.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good mother anyway?

Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips?

The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?

Or is it in her heart?

Is it the ache she feels when she watches her son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?

The jolt that takes her from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put her hand on the back of a sleeping baby?

The panic, years later, that comes againat 2 A.M. when she just wants to heartheir key in the door and know they are safe again in her home?

Or the need to flee from wherever she is and hug her child when she hears news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation...And for mature mothers learning to let go.For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers. Single mothers and married mothers. Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all. For all of us...Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can. Tell them every day that we love them. And pray and never stop being a mother...

One step at a time...

I love it when my kids come running up to me with a huge smile and the look of accomplishment in their eyes, telling me about what they have just done. By themselves. Its a glorious moment for them and I let them live it. As for me, well... I am happy. But, deep down I know that when they learn to do something on their own, its one less thing they will need me for.

Jade has been struggling with the dreaded sippys! That tiny straw that comes attached to the side and the micro sized hole they want the end of the straw to poke. It just wasnt her thing... Until today. She defeated the sippy! She managed to get the straw into the hole with out squeezing half the contents of the pouch all over her! And she made sure I knew about it :)

I remember the day I realized my Robbie didnt need me to cut up his hot dogs anymore. He had been eatting whole hot dogs for a while but it never dawned on me that I needed to stop cutting them up. You kinda go onto this routine with them and its hard to snap out of it at the right times.

I was sitting down at a resturant with him and Cliff, cutting up the giant hot dog. I looked down at my knife and fork and stopped in the middle of cutting a piece off. I was like "what am I doing? I dont need to do this anymore for him. He's been eatting soild food whole for 5 months now!" I laughed at myself. Then I told Cliff my earth shattering news and went home to shower and cry.

With each child I birth, I start new. But in the end, I still have to stop cutting up the hot dog at one point in time.

Truth be told... I cut up their food sometimes just to do it and tell them that it needed to cool off and that was a faster way of doing it lol

Its hard letting go of the hand you been holding for so long. And it never gets easy to let your newborn become an infant then transform into a toddler only to quickly become school aged. Im not even thinking about college... or them becoming mothers and fathers themselves. Im just enjoying them as they are and extending my hand for the things that they still need me for.

I love my babies... I love them so much!